What Taylor Swift Is Teaching Men About Inclusion

When my business partner, Anne Igeltjørn, invited me to a Taylor Swift album launch party, I hesitated.

Not because I didn’t like Taylor Swift - I do. (Blame Anne for introducing me to Reputation and Midnights.) I hesitated because I wasn’t sure I belonged.

I pictured a sea of glitter, friendship bracelets, and women in their teens and twenties singing every lyric by heart. And then me - a 45-year-old man, clapping on the wrong beat, trying not to look like someone’s confused uncle.

But Anne got me a ticket, and a simple “of course, you should come!” turned into a quiet masterclass in inclusion.

Men, This Is What Inclusion Feels Like

Here’s the thing: I was nervous to walk into a space that wasn’t built for me. But that’s the feeling a lot of people live with every day - stepping into rooms where they’re not sure they belong.

And that night, I got a tiny glimpse of what that feels like.

But I also got something else: an example of how inclusion actually happens.

Because no one at that event made me feel like an outsider. No one questioned why I was there. No one treated me like an intruder.

It was open, joyful, welcoming. The kind of energy that says, “You can sit with us.”

And for a lot of men in leadership - especially those of us used to being the default in most rooms - that’s a lesson worth sitting with.

What Taylor Swift Does That Many Leaders Don’t

Taylor Swift has built one of the most engaged, loyal communities in the world. But she didn’t do it by commanding authority. She did it by creating connection.

By letting people see her. By being vulnerable. By telling stories that make millions feel seen too.

That’s not weakness. That’s leadership.

She’s built an ecosystem where empathy is a feature, not a flaw - where emotions aren’t just accepted but celebrated. And that’s something a lot of male leaders could learn from.

Three Things Men Can Learn From the Swifties

💡 1. Show Up Anyway. Sometimes inclusion starts with discomfort. If you only enter rooms that feel familiar, you’ll never grow your empathy.

🎶 2. Listen Before You Lead. Swift’s power isn’t just in her voice - it’s in how she gives voice to others. Men who want to lead inclusively should do the same.

🪩 3. Celebrate Without Controlling. At that launch party, no one was trying to “manage” the joy. People were crying, laughing, dancing, and being human. Real leadership doesn’t control the energy - it creates safety for it.

The Real Test of Inclusion

After the event, I scrolled through social media. The backlash was immediate - the jokes, the dismissiveness, the casual misogyny dressed up as critique.

And I thought: This is what women experience all the time. This constant judgment, this cultural policing of joy, this need to make something smaller just because it wasn’t made for you.

That’s the real test for men who want to be allies: Can you celebrate something even when it’s not about you?

The Bigger Picture

We talk a lot about men joining the conversation on inclusion. But joining means more than attending a training or signing a pledge. It means showing up in spaces where you’re not the center, and listening without defensiveness.

It means doing what Anne did for me that night: inviting someone in, without hesitation, and saying, “There’s room for you here.”

P.S. Inclusion doesn’t start in boardrooms. It starts in small, human moments, an open invitation, a song, a shared story.

So, men - maybe our next leadership lesson isn’t in a seminar. Maybe it’s at a Taylor Swift concert. 💫